Where to start with this movie. How about here. I am just one person and this is my opinion. I don't think of myself as a movie critic but just someone who loves movies.
Maybe I am just not smart enough to follow this movie, it was a hot mess. An Autobot ship crashed on the Dark side of the moon, Megatron comes out of hiding and wants to restart the War. Are you still with me, something about teleportation and wanting to turn all of us into slaves.
Here we go with the negative. Transformers: Dark of the Moon is the summer movie you would expect from Michael Bay, a ton of action and explosions. But we don't actually get that until the second act of the film. We did get to see some new characters in the film (that were underdeveloped) and characters that really had no point being in the film. Yes, they got rid of the two clowns from the second film, but don't fear they have two more Jar Jar Binks in this movie. Wheelie makes his return with Brains. Why can't we have a movie without comedic sidekicks, sure they made me laugh a few times but they add nothing to the movie at all. I am sure George Lucas is smiling in his office now.
The film itself could have been trimmed down almost an hour, the run time for the film is 2 hours and 37 minutes.
The story didn't have any real flow to me and the action really didn't kick in until about an hour into the film. Too much story Mr. Bay, we come to see your movies for action and kick ass explosions, not a love story. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley how do you keep your clothes so white during the whole second half of the film during the battle in Chicago and where did you find time to change? Running and jumping in 6" heels. Ladies really, you all can do this? If this is true, I am amazed. Yes, I notice these things.
"I just want to matter," Sam Witwicky says with tears in his eyes, really? This is a key point in the film, this is the guy who saved the world twice and now he is begging for a JOB.
At times the film felt like a huge commercial. All the product placements throughout the film, I wanted to go drive a GM car while I play on my Lenovo computer at home, watching Autobot NASCAR 500.
Enough of the negative here are some positive things about the movie.
The Transforming of the robots in this film was very smooth and visually amazing. Cars, cars and more cars. I think my brother was more excited to see the Datsun 510 (Hakisuka/4 door Skyline for all you car nerds) than Optimus Prime.
The base jumping they did for the film was shot perfect, almost fells like you are one of the NEST teams jumping out of the plane.
The battle scene in Chicago was visually incredible and what I expected from the movie. Autobots and Decepticons beating the hell out of each other. It was better then the second film if that makes the pain go away any easier.
When the war on Cybertron between the Autobots and Decepticons appears lost to the Autobots, their leader, Sentinel Prime, attempts to launch the Ark from their planet, containing technology that could have saved his kind. Attacked by Starscream, it crashes on Earth's moon in 1961. President John F. Kennedy makes his famous promise to the nation to put a man on the moon. The 1969 NASA moon landing is actually an investigation of the wrecked spacecraft. Which I thought was clever and not a bad back story to start the film.
We see Sam Witwicky out of college and with no job. With Mikaela (Megan Fox) out of the picture Sam has moved onto Carly Spencer (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley) this guy must have super game, maybe if they make a Transformers 4 they could have Sam become a dating expert and give advice to men how to date lovely ladies. Her character is loosely based on the character with the same name from the original 1984 animated series.
If your a fan of cameos then you'll enjoy seeing Patrick Dempsey who is a complete sell out in the movie, John Malkovich who should have never been in the movie (added nothing to it but a paycheck for himself ), Alan Tudyk who is pointless (stick to Firefly conventions) and the one and only Mr.Chow (Ken Jeong) who gave us a few laughs in the scenes he was in.
When we finally get to the final act of the film, you finally get your movies worth with the final battle. The sound and action wake you up from the long nap you might have been taking.
Don't get me wrong this movie is going to make a butt load of money and there is already talk about wanting a fourth film, which I really don't want to see happen. Why beat a dead horse to death.
6 out of 10 Sandwiches with an empty box of popcorn
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