Skip to main content

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD In AUSTIN

Lucky Bastard Review. Believe Me, It's That Bad

Lucky Bastard Review
By: MattInRC

It goes without saying that we at SJF sometimes review films not meant for theatrical release. Sometimes referred to as 'Direct-to-DVD,' many of these feature poor scripts, worse acting, and a sense that film students were given free reign by someone who didn't know any better. Lucky Bastard is one of these, a tasteless and scattershot film utterly without value or even the sense to know it's dead on arrival.

Slapped with an NC-17 rating for extreme nudity and imagined scenes of rape, the story follows a team of porno producers and actresses as they run into a fan who just won't take 'no' for an answer after a contest goes bad. It's a 'found footage' affair, complete with jittery pans and dizzying tennis-style back and forth as our actors pound each other before the bad guy arrives to have sex with the company's top dog. When he's mocked for prematurely shooting his wad, the young kid has his revenge, whacking nearly everyone before dying himself at the hands of Lucky Bastard's finest asset.

We could have given it higher ratings had the film actually decided on using real bondage techniques to tie up its victims, or the acting had been above the high school musical effort we're forced to endure. Lucky Bastard - the name of the porn website - can't reveal its sexual nature for fear of being branded a straight-up porno, but keeps reminding us of a rejected candidate for Cinemax After Dark. At least there, we get closeups of T&A - here, it's a 'whoops!' moment of full-frontal hilarity, followed by declarations of why porn is such a leecher's environment. No duh, but that message gets lost early on and by the end we couldn't care who dies. It's not even good enough to be granted the 'so bad it's funny' title, reminding us instead of the old adage, 'just because you can, doesn't mean you should.'

Lucky Bastard doesn't know when to quit - it becomes so entrenched in its 'horror-porn' personality that it forgets why it exists in the first place. We can't recommend this on any level, for its obvious stage production values detract from any message about the industry it tries so desperately to make. It's rated NC-17 and has a runtime of 94 excruciating minutes.

Discuss this review with fellow SJF fans on Facebook. On Twitter, follow us at @SandwichJFilms, and follow author Matt Cummings at @mfc90125.

Please Leave A Comment-

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See THE SHAPE OF WATER In Cleveland #TheShapeofWater

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See THE SHAPE OF WATER on December 11th at 7:00 PM in Cleveland.

From master story teller, Guillermo del Toro, comes THE SHAPE OF WATER - an other-worldly fable, set against the backdrop of Cold War era America circa 1962. In the hidden high-security government laboratory where she works, lonely Elisa (Sally Hawkins) is trapped in a life of isolation. Elisa’s life is changed forever when she and co-worker Zelda (Octavia Spencer) discover a secret classified experiment. Rounding out the cast are Michael Shannon, Richard Jenkins, Michael Stuhlbarg and Doug Jones.



CLICK HERE TO ENTER-

Visit The Shape Of Water on our WEBSITE: https://theshapeofwaterthemovie.com
Like The Shape Of Water on FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/theshapeofwa...
Follow The Shape Of Water on TWITTER: https://twitter.com/shapeofwater
#TheShapeofWater

NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.

SEATING IS LIMITED, SO ARRIVE EARLY.

PASS DOES NOT GUARANTEE A SEAT AT THE SCREENING.

This screening w…

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See THE GREATEST SHOWMAN In Las Vegas

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See THE GREATEST SHOWMAN on December 10th at 10:00 AM in Las Vegas.

At this screening guests will enjoy free popcorn and soda, free face painting, and a free photo booth themed to the movie.

The Greatest Showman” is a bold and original musical that celebrates the birth of show business and the sense of wonder we feel when dreams come to life. Inspired by the ambition and imagination of P.T. Barnum, “The Greatest Showman” tells the story of a visionary who rose from nothing to create a mesmerizing spectacle that became a worldwide sensation.

“The Greatest Showman” is directed by exciting new filmmaker, Michael Gracey, with songs by Academy Award winners Benj Pasek and Justin Paul (“La La Land”) and starring Academy Award nominee Hugh Jackman. Jackman is joined by Academy Award nominee Michelle Williams, Zendaya, Zac Efron and Rebecca Ferguson.

CLICK HERE TO ENTER-

https://www.foxmovies.com/movies/the-greatest-showman
@GreatestShowman
#GreatestShowma…

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See DOWNSIZING In Las Vegas

Enter For A Chance To Win Passes To See DOWNSIZING on December 19th at 7:00 PM in Las Vegas.

DOWNSIZING imagines what might happen if, as a solution to over-population, Norwegian scientists discover how to shrink humans to five inches tall and propose a 200-year global transition from big to small. People soon realize how much further money goes in a miniaturized world, and with the promise of a better life, everyman Paul Safranek (Matt Damon) and wife Audrey (Kristen Wiig) decide to abandon their stressed lives in Omaha in order to get small and move to a new downsized community — a choice that triggers life-changing adventures.



CLICK HERE TO ENTER-

DOWNSIZING is in theaters December 22

DOWNSIZING Official Channels
Hashtag: #Downsizing
Facebook: /DownsizingFilm
Twitter: @DownsizingFilm
Instagram: @DownsizingFilm
Website: DownsizingMovie.com

NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.

SEATING IS LIMITED, SO ARRIVE EARLY.

PASS DOES NOT GUARANTEE A SEAT AT THE SCREENING.

This screening will be monitored…