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Who the heck are you guys?
5secondfilms! 20-something internet comedy troupe #2,307. We've been providing sketch comedy videos, exactly 5 seconds in length, every single weekday since 2008. In the past 5 years we have NEVER missed a day. It's that consistency and reliability that has helped build a loving fanbase that comes back day after day.
This hard work has been recognized by celebrities and media outlets around the world, including CNN, SPIN Magazine, and TIME, which named 5sf one of the 50 Best Websites of 2013.
But our ideas and passion couldn't be contained in 5 seconds for long. We've shot longer sketches in the past, and now we put out weekly sketches on Uproxx Video.
Yet it still wasn't enough...WE WANTED MORE SECONDS!
Then we remembered a blood, sweat and beer-fueled 5sf called Dude Bro Party Massacre 3:
So, wait...this is going to be longer than 5 seconds, right?
Yes! Jeez haven't you been paying attention? It's going to be longer than a 5sf and it's even going to be longer than the 88-second trailer we shot a couple years back:
We're talking a FULL LENGTH FEATURE FILM MOVIE! That's like 5,400 seconds! And the more comments we saw on both videos, the more we knew that we weren't the only ones who wanted to see these oiled-up bros get chopped to bits in the gory, blood-spraying, hilarious fashion that 5secondfilms is oh-so-good at. Bloody and funny! That's how we like it. Kinda like this one:
Okay. I get it. So what's this movie going to be about?
DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE 3 follows BRENT CHIRINO as he enters the oil-misted halls of the DELTA BI THETA fraternity. Brent isn’t just any pledge... he’s a legacy. And it’s a legacy of death. See, Brent is here to solve the mystery of his identical twin brother BROCK’s murder, and he’ll do anything to crack the case... even attempt the frat’s most daring prank of all time.
After the Deltas’ senior prank causes two commercial jets to collide over an orphanage, they’re punished to a weekend at The Old Sorority House by the Lake. But they’re not the only ones there... a mysterious killer named MOTHERFACE lurks nearby. She knows the bros’ deepest fears... and she’s taking advantage of those fears to pick them off, one by shirtless one, in increasingly gory ways. It’s a race against time for Brent to discover the mysteries of his brother’s death before Motherface butchers them all!
But wait, there’s more! DUDE BRO PARTY MASSACRE 3 also features a softcore subplot, spliced in by the Filipino “producers!” Join Chico County’s own OFFICER SMINKLE as he investigates a rash of nudie trading cards featuring all the most bodacious sorority babes at East Chico University! Marvel as this gratuitous subplot somehow intersects with the main story!
Still not satisfied? What if we told you that this whole crazy package takes the form of a VHS recording that a Midwestern teenager made from a late-night broadcast in the late 80s? Which means you get the film, plus host segments, TV commercial parodies, fake news alerts, and more? Would that convince you to give us money? If not, go rent “Real Steel” and eat some Weight Watchers with your ferrets.
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