TV Review: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. "Love in the Time of Hydra"

Coulson’s abilities are questioned, as well they should be.

Review by Brandon Wolfe

When Gonzales (Edward James Olmos, another impressive “get” for the series), the head of the “real S.H.I.E.L.D.,” informs Hunter of all the reasons why Coulson is not fit to run the agency, it’s hard to argue with any of them. Coulson has been infused with alien DNA, leading him to make erratic decisions. The deaths that happened on his watch were indirectly his fault. Moreover, the success rate in the apprehension of villains under his command is a big, fat goose egg and he runs his unit more like a squishy den mother than a lead agent. Coulson is the pits, and it creates a sort of cognitive dissonance in the viewer when the person making the most sense is someone we’re supposed to immediately distrust because he dares to oppose the chief protagonist. If Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. were a smarter show, I’d think that perhaps it purposefully intended to call into question the competency of its hero. But this is Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. This is not a smart show.

It’s also not a consistent one, since the episode opens with Coulson and May both deciding that removing Skye from active duty is the smart play. While this is a rare intelligent decision for the characters, it also runs counter to their stated “all Skye needs is hugs” stance from recent weeks (May’s position, in particular, is the polar opposite of what it was at the conclusion of last week, meaning the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. writers must have as hard a time remembering what happens on their own show as I do). Coulson takes Skye to a secluded cabin in the woods (surrounded by a laser field, in what has to be a nod to a much, much better Joss Whedon production), one once occupied by Captain America, in one of a few “remember the cool stuff we’re technically associated with?” Avengers reminders this week. Skye’s deactivation causes a lot of teary-eyed friction between Fitz and Simmons, both of whom still act as though they’re better suited to a jungle gym than an intelligence agency. Again, the bulk of Coulson’s team consists of butt-hurt marshmallows perpetually fighting back the urge to cry. Advantage: Gonzales.

Ward resurfaces again this week to remind everyone who has understandably forgotten that he’s still on this show. He’s now partnered with Agent 33, the operative who used that facial cloning mask - the same model that Black Widow utilized in The Winter Soldier - to impersonate Agent May for reasons I couldn’t recall right now at gunpoint. Anyway, her encounter with May left Agent 33 facially scarred and with the mask permanently fused to her face, locked in May mode. She and Ward concoct a plan to nab the mask’s creator, by ripping off the opening scene in Pulp Fiction, so that he can fix her face. This leads to a scheme where the two infiltrate the air force base holding Bakshi, the guy in earlier episodes who did things that I don’t recall and don’t care enough to track down a Wiki page to re-learn. This is accomplished by 33 impersonating the wife of Agent Talbot (Adrian Pasdar, asked to do a lot of embarrassing comic relief). Despite Coulson’s best efforts (see how bad he is at this stuff?), Bakshi is successfully kidnapped and is last seen being Clockwork Oranged, for reasons we’ll learn later and forget soon after.

The return and beefed-up prominence of Agent 33 is odd. Again, my retention of the minutiae of this show isn’t great, but I thought she was just a throwaway character designed solely for the sight gag of May kickboxing herself. She didn’t strike me as a likely candidate for an increased presence. I suspect she only exists because she can, and does, morph into May and Skye, allowing Ming-Na Wen and Chloe Bennet to play something other than the one-note characters in which they’re constantly straitjacketed. Although it’s not like Ward himself really has much of a place on this show anymore, either. With all the villains knocking about lately, he seems like an afterthought, an echo continuing to reverberate because he has first-season seniority. This show could really use a good pruning.

The idea of another S.H.I.E.L.D. that opposes that bonehead Coulson and his cadre of creampuffs remains the best idea this show currently has going. The fact that nü-S.H.I.E.L.D. counts among its ranks Bobbi and Mack, the two characters who have seemed substantially more qualified than the rest of Coulson’s team, speaks to this branch’s greater sense of legitimacy. The problem with this, however, is that Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. isn’t aware that it’s broken, so the opportunity to use this new angle as either a means of honest self-evaluation or even as a corrective measure is extremely unlikely. Like Coulson himself, the show has no idea how thoroughly incompetent it is.

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